Walking My Baby Back Home Read online

  He eyed her swollen tummy and his lips curled. ‘God, look at the state of yer, it’s enough to put anyone off.’

  ‘Nobody’s asking yer to look at me; go about yer business.’

  ‘I need threepence, hand it over.’

  Mary looked at him in amazement. How could he expect her to have money on a Friday night? ‘I haven’t got a penny to me name! How the hell do yer expect me to have any money left out of the pittance you give me? Yer get yer wages tomorrow, do without yer ale until then, it won’t kill yer.’

  Without warning, his two curled fists aimed blows at her belly, first one hand, then the other. And Mary, fearful for her baby, turned from him as quickly as she could and stood facing the sink. The blows kept coming, so hard she really believed if he kept it up he’d break her back. The man is mad, she thought, he’ll kill me. ‘There’s a couple of coppers on the shelf there,’ she gasped. ‘I keep it for the gas meter. Take that and get out.’

  She heard the scrape of coppers as he scooped them from the shelf and she could imagine the gloating she’d see on his face if she turned around. But she didn’t turn, she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing the tears rolling down her cheeks. She just wanted him to go so she could sit down and try to find some ease from the pains in her back. She heard the front door bang and made to move, but a wave of dizziness came over her and she gripped tight hold of the edge of the sink. Please don’t let me faint, please! she cried inwardly as the window in the kitchen kept moving nearer to her and then fading away. She could feel herself swaying on her feet but sheer determination and the support of the sink kept her upright as she dipped a hand into the cold water and doused her face with it, over and over again until the feeling of weakness passed. Then her anger took over. How dare he treat her as though she was a piece of dirt! If he’d harmed her baby she’d kill him. Even if it meant going to the gallows, it would be worth it. Tom Campbell had no right to live on this earth; he was a devil and the place for him was hell.

  Holding on to the wall and pieces of furniture, Mary slowly made her way to the couch. The pains in her back were excruciating and she cried out as she lowered herself on to the seat. What sort of a man had she married? He certainly wasn’t normal. As the father of the baby, he should be proud and looking forward to it being born. He should be a shoulder for her to cry on, not to be the one to cause the tears.

  Mary grimaced as she reached for a cushion to put behind her back. The pains might ease off soon, please God. Then she’d go upstairs for the bedding for the couch and settle herself down. She had the urge to release some of the pressure in her head by crying, but her tears of anger, frustration and sadness would have to wait. They said that unborn babies feel all the emotions of the mother and become distressed. So for the baby’s sake she must try to keep calm. After the birth, when she felt stronger, she’d make up her mind what she intended doing with her life and the baby’s. And her plans didn’t include Tom Campbell. She had to get away from him to keep her sanity and for the sake of her child’s happiness.

  Mary rubbed a hand over her swollen abdomen. Speaking softly, she said, ‘It might take some time for me to get yer away from this house of evil, sweetheart, because I haven’t the money to do it. But I promise yer I’ll never let him hurt yer, not while I have breath in my body.’

  ‘It’s a beautiful morning, sunshine. Summer has come with a vengeance. The sky’s a lovely clear blue with little white clouds bobbing about like balls of cotton wool.’ Dot placed a plate of toast in front of her daughter and grinned down into her face. ‘Makes yer feel good to be alive on a morning like this. It would be even better if we had the summer clothes to go with it. You and me could do with one or two cotton dresses. I’ll be sweltering working in this ruddy jumper and skirt.’

  ‘One of the customers was saying there’s a sale on in TJs, and they’ve got cotton dresses for four and eleven.’ Katy bit into a piece of toast. ‘You could buy yerself one this week and I’ll wait until next week. It’s not so bad for me, it doesn’t get that hot in the shop.’

  ‘Or we could dip into the money we’ve been saving towards a new three-piece. We can make it up over the next few weeks.’

  Katy’s face lit up. ‘Yeah, let’s go mad and do that, Mam. You go down this afternoon and get us one each. I’d love a new dress, in blue or green, with short sleeves.’

  ‘I’ll see what I can do, sunshine. Now I’d better get Mary’s porridge over to her then put me skates on or I’ll be late for work.’

  Dot was spooning the porridge into a dish when Katy called, ‘There’s someone at the door, Mam, and if I’m not mistaken, it’s Mary. Shall I go?’

  Dot bustled through. ‘No, I’ll go and she can take her porridge back with her. I haven’t got time to talk so I hope it’s nothing important.’

  But one look at her neighbour told her it was important. There was pain etched on her face and her eyes were red-rimmed from crying. ‘In the name of God, Mary, what is it?’

  ‘Me back is killing me, I’ve hardly slept a wink. But I didn’t come to moan, Dot, I only came to tell yer I wouldn’t be going to the pictures with you and John tonight.’

  Dot nodded knowingly. ‘Yer know what the sign of a bad back is, don’t yer? It means the baby’s not far off.’

  ‘No, it can’t be, I’ve got another couple of weeks to go.’

  ‘Any midwife will tell yer, Mary, that a first baby can come two weeks early or two weeks late. Now I haven’t got time to help yer, I should be on me way to work. But I’ll give yer the dish with yer porridge in and while ye’re getting that down yer I’ll give Maggie and Betty a knock. They’ll keep their eye on yer until I get back. I won’t go to the shops, I’ll come straight home. It might be a false alarm, then again it might not.’

  Dot handed the dish over and watched as her neighbour walked away. Every step was agony, she could tell, and it set her wondering. She remembered having backache just before her two were born, but she couldn’t remember it being too painful to walk, or so bad it made her cry.

  ‘Listen, sunshine, I’ll have to fly,’ she told Katy, ‘but will yer tell our Colin not to leave this house no matter how many mates call for him? I think Mary’s baby might be on its way and if it is I’ll want to stay with her. That means Colin will have to get all me shopping in, and he’ll have to go to John’s to tell him it’s not on for the pictures tonight. Have yer got that, sunshine?’

  ‘Ooh, er, is Mary’s baby going to be born today?’

  ‘I really don’t know, Katy, we’ll just have to wait and see. Don’t you breathe a word to anyone, not even our Colin.’ Dot reached the door and grinned. ‘Most definitely not our Colin.’

  Betty and Maggie stood with worried looks on their faces as they gazed down at Mary. ‘I think the best place for you is bed, me darlin’,’ Maggie said. ‘Anyone with half an eye can see ye’re in pain.’

  ‘Shall we send for the doctor, girl?’ Betty asked. ‘Just to be on the safe side?’

  Mary shook her head. ‘Mrs Wainwright’s coming to deliver the baby, but I don’t know whether the pains I’m getting are labour pains. I don’t want her to come and find it’s a false alarm.’ Just then a cramp gripped her and she doubled up. ‘It was me back before, but now I’m getting pains in me tummy.’

  ‘How often are yer getting them, girl?’

  ‘That was the third bad one.’

  ‘Yeah, but what I mean is, how long between the pains?’

  ‘I don’t know – about twenty minutes.’ There was fear in Mary’s eyes and it struck right through to the hearts of her two neighbours. ‘I’m getting frightened.’

  ‘There’s nothing to be frightened of, girl, it’ll be over before yer know it.’ Betty thought about the racket she’d made when hers were being delivered, but she wisely kept that to herself. Mary wouldn’t think it funny if she told her that if she had a choice between giving birth or a quarter of walnut toffee, the toffees would win hands down. ‘I think yer’d better b
e getting into a nightie and going to bed. Maggie will help yer do that while I run round for Mrs Wainwright.’ For all her size Betty was light on her feet and in no time at all she was bouncing down the street to fetch Mrs Wainwright, who had retired from nursing many years ago but was still favoured by most women in the neighbourhood to deliver their babies.

  Mary hadn’t worn a nightdress for years, didn’t even own one. When you didn’t have enough money for food and coal, a nightdress was an unaffordable luxury. But she’d found one in amongst the clothes John had brought round months ago, and she’d kept it in the cupboard at the side of the fireplace for this very day. She got it out now and said shyly, ‘I’ll go up and get undressed, Maggie, then I’ll get into bed and give yer a shout.’

  ‘Sure, yer shouldn’t be going up those stairs on yer own, me darlin’. I’ll give yer a hand up, so I will.’

  ‘I’ll be all right, honestly. Yer can stand at the bottom of the stairs if yer like.’

  ‘Mary, don’t you be worrying yer head about things that don’t really matter, like the bed not being changed or the bedroom untidy. Sure, it’s yerself we’re concerned about, not the state of yer house.’ Maggie patted her arm. ‘Off yer go, me darlin’. I’ll stand on the stairs and wait until ye’re ready.’

  Mary was in bed when Maggie entered the room, and her clean nightdress was a stark contrast to the rest of the dismal room. The Irishwoman kept a smile on her face but her heart was sad. This was a room that had never known love. The wallpaper was dark brown with age, the ceiling was badly in need of whitening, the blankets on the bed were frayed and the sheets and pillow-cases were discoloured and threadbare. The room wasn’t dirty, it was obvious Mary did the best she could, but it was an unwelcoming room, one you would like to get out of as quickly as you could. By God, Tom Campbell would have a lot to answer for when he met his Maker.

  ‘We’ll wait until Mrs Wainwright has a look at yer, me darlin’, and if she says the baby’s on its way I’ll nip home and get all the things yer’ll need. But while we’re waiting, would yer like me to make yer a nice cup of tea?’

  ‘The gas has gone, Maggie, and I’ve no coppers.’ Mary didn’t like to lie to this good woman but she felt bound to make an excuse. ‘I used the last one during the night.’

  ‘Well, that’s no problem. Haven’t I a stack of them on me kitchen shelf? But I’ll not be leaving yer until Betty gets back, so try and relax until then.’ Maggie plumped the pillow and smiled at the woman who had a look of terror on her face. ‘Sure, it’ll be a mercy if the baby comes today and yer get it over with. I’ve never had a baby meself, but back in Ireland all me friends had. And they all said that once the baby is laid in yer arms, yer forget all the pain and the worry.’

  ‘I think I heard a knock on the door, Maggie.’

  ‘It’s sharp ears yer have, me darlin’, I didn’t hear a thing.’ Maggie ran down the stairs talking to herself. ‘Too busy jabbering, I was, to hear anything but the sound of me own voice.’

  Betty gestured to Mrs Wainwright to lead the way, then followed her into the hall. ‘I was just in time, Gertie was ready to go to the shops. Another couple of minutes and I’d have missed her.’

  ‘How is Mary?’ Gertrude Wainwright was sixty-eight years but as spritely as someone half her age. She was small and slim with white hair that was always neatly waved, and she still had all her own teeth. ‘I examined her last week and it looked then as though she’d go her full term.’

  ‘I hope we’ve haven’t brought yer on a wild-goose chase, Mrs Wainwright,’ Maggie said, ‘but I’ll be glad if yer’ll have a look at her. The poor soul is frightened out of her wits.’

  ‘Right, let’s not waste any time.’ The older woman was up the stairs before Betty reached the third step. ‘Well, now, Mary, what’s all this, then? The baby’s decided to enter the world early, has it?’

  ‘I don’t know, Mrs Wainwright.’ Mary lowered her eyes. She wasn’t afraid of giving birth, she was used to pain. But she was afraid of the shame that would burst on her any moment now. ‘I hope so, to get it over with.’

  ‘Then let’s have you lying down, dear, so I can see what’s going on.’ When Mary’s eyes went to the two women standing at the foot of the bed, the old lady waved them out. ‘Let the girl have some privacy, I’ll call you when I’m finished.’

  Betty and Maggie were standing on the landing when they heard a cry. ‘Oh, my God! Mary, my dear, how did this happen?’

  ‘To hell with privacy.’ Betty opened the door and barged in, Maggie close on her heels. ‘What is it, Gertie?’

  ‘This.’ Mrs Wainwright pulled the sheet back a little and heard the two women gasp with horror as they looked on the swollen tummy, covered in angry black and blue bruises. ‘One of you will have to run for Dr Gray, I can’t take the responsibility of delivering a baby with the mother in this condition.’ She bent to stroke Mary’s damp hair. ‘What happened, my dear? You must tell me.’

  ‘I’ll tell yer for her,’ Betty cried, anger and pity fighting for supremacy. ‘It was that bleeding, no-good husband of hers, and I’ll strangle him when I get me hands on him.’

  ‘Oh, no, surely not?’ In all her years of delivering babies, Gertrude had never encountered anything like this. ‘Mary, is your husband responsible for these injuries?’

  The young woman’s eyes were closed and her voice was a mere whisper. ‘Yes, my brave husband did that to me, last night. All for the sake of threepence, he was prepared to kill my baby.’

  ‘The man is an animal.’ The old lady’s voice was low, but the three women heard it and agreed. ‘Betty, run for Dr Gray and tell him it’s urgent. The baby might be stillborn.’

  Mary grasped her arm. ‘No, the baby’s alive, I can feel it kicking.’

  Maggie, crying silently in the background, blessed herself and said a little prayer. ‘Please, God, she’s suffered enough, don’t let her lose the baby.’

  ‘I’ll be as quick as I can, Gertie,’ Betty said as she left the room. ‘I’ll bring the doctor back with me if I have to drag him every foot of the way.’

  ‘He’ll come if you tell him I said it’s urgent,’ Mrs Wainwright called after her as she covered Mary with the sheet. ‘While we’re waiting, my dear, perhaps your neighbour here could make sure there’s plenty of hot water on the go, just in case. And you’ll need some clean towels and plenty of old sheets.’

  ‘Everything is ready, so it is.’ Maggie was happy she could say that for Mary’s sake. At least it would allow the poor soul to hold on to what little pride and dignity she had left. ‘Sure, doesn’t my back bedroom look like a nursery? She has everything ready, has Mary, all neatly folded on me spare bed.’ She saw the query in the older woman’s eyes and told her truthfully, ‘Mary didn’t want the things here because of her husband. He’s a devil of a man, right enough, and that’s the truth of it. He doesn’t want the baby, and with the violent temper he has, it was thought best he didn’t see the baby things in case he destroyed them. And nobody doubts for one moment that he’s wicked enough to do that.’

  Gertrude shook her head. If this baby was born alive, what sort of life did the future hold for it? Unloved by a brutal father, perhaps it would be merciful if it was stillborn.

  ‘I’ll slip home, me darlin’, now ye’re in safe hands, and make yer a nice cup of tea. And while I’m waiting for the kettle to boil, I can be sorting out what the nurse needs.’

  ‘Thanks, Maggie.’ Mary was smiling at her neighbour when suddenly her eyes and mouth opened wide and she let out a loud shriek as she clutched her tummy. She tried to sit up but the effort was too much and her head sank back into the pillow. ‘Oh, dear God, this is the worst one I’ve had.’

  ‘How long since the last one, my dear?’

  Mary didn’t hear her; the pain was so great she thought it would split her insides. Her breath coming in short bursts, she gripped the blanket with both hands and rocked from side to side. ‘Oh, dear God, help me.’

  ‘The
last pain was over half an hour ago,’ Maggie said. ‘Me and Betty had just got here and Mary said it was the third spasm.’

  ‘You go and make the tea, then, Maggie, there’s still a long way to go. I won’t touch her until the doctor gets here because I have to cover myself, you understand?’ Gertrude rolled her eyes towards the door, a sign that she wanted to say something that wasn’t for Mary’s ears. Out on the landing, she said softly, ‘The bruises you’ve seen on her tummy are nothing compared to the ones on her back. Heaven alone knows what injuries that maniac has caused and I’m not qualified to say. After the doctor’s examined her, it wouldn’t surprise me in the least if he sent her into hospital.’

  ‘It’s the demon she’s married to that should be sent to hospital – one for the criminally insane.’ Maggie had never felt more like cursing than she did at that moment. And it was with great difficulty that she restrained herself. ‘There’s a few men in the street who would like to whip him for what he’s done to Mary, and my Paddy is one of them. Not only the men, either! Didn’t Betty herself take her fists to him not so long ago?’

  A faint smile crossed Gertrude’s face. ‘Ah, Betty, she’s a great one for sticking up for the underdog. What a pity she didn’t finish him off altogether.’

  ‘Sure, yer might have the pleasure of seeing her do that before the day’s over.’ Maggie started to go downstairs. ‘I’ll make Mary a drink, the poor soul hasn’t had one all morning.’

  ‘Make it in a big pot, Maggie, I think we could all do with one.’

  Dr Gray couldn’t hide his disgust after examining Mary. ‘What sort of an animal are you married to, Mrs Campbell?’

  ‘What yer’ve seen of me should tell yer what sort of an animal he is, Doctor.’

  ‘He must be barking mad, that’s all I can say. Didn’t he realise he could have killed you and the baby?’

  ‘My baby’s not dead, is it, Doctor?’ There was pleading in Mary’s voice. ‘I couldn’t stand that, not after all I’ve been through.’